More from the Holy Shit, Are You Serious? Department: Variety broke the news yesterday that two writers from the American version of “The Office” have been hired to script a third Ghostbusters film. The eleven year old inside of me just exploded.
Columbia Pictures is keeping their trap shut about this for right now, but director and Aykroyd pal John Landis told the BBC yesterday that GB3 is happening FOR REALZ. Read the original Variety article here; check the BBC report here.
Hey Ghostbusters people, since I like “The Office” so much and I want the third GB film to be as good as the first one, I hereby give you permission to use any and all of JG2’s Awesome Ideas For Ghostbusters 3, which are as follows:
- Ghostbusters die, come back as ghosts, fight for paranormal rights
- Stay Puft returns with the voice of Chris Tucker
- Ghostbusters vs. Beetlejuice
- Ghostbusters vs. Beetlejuice in Hawaii
- Annie Potts lesbian sex scene
- Ernie Hudson gay kiss
- Ectomobile races Knight Rider through Utah Salt Flats
- Ghostbusters vs. Roger Rabbit
- shoot entire film in Claymation
- shoot entire film in Esperanto
- shoot entire film in 1987
All kidding aside, read between the lines of that Variety piece:
“An attempt to make a third installment of the franchise was stymied in the dealmaking stage. Sources said so much gross was pledged to the participants that it was next to impossible for the studio to make any money on a third installment.”
I imagine those gross pledges are still in place. What does this mean? Ghostbusters 3 may be “designed to bring back together the original cast,” but they sure as hell won’t be starring in it. I predict short cameo action to avoid paying out that top dollar. So who will star? A new generation of Ghostbusters, most likely – people like Seth Rogan, Jonah Hill, Michael Cera, James Franco, etc. That’s what all the rumors were suggesting over the years anyway. Mark my words. GB3 will be all about young gun Ghostbusters with quick pop-ins from Stanz, Spengler, Venkman, and Zeddmore.
Of course, I hope I’m wrong, but come on. I remember hearing plenty of stories back in the day about what a pain in the financial ass it was to line up the original cast for Ghostbusters 2. You think Bill Murray gives a shit about Ghostbusting again? You’d have to drive six dump trucks of money up to his house. Rick Moranis? That motherfucker wouldn’t even participate in the video game.*
That reminds me: one of the last times he was on Letterman, Dave went through Bill Murray’s extensive, impressive filmography. When he got to Ghostbusters, the audience broke into loud applause, but Murray just sat there and blinked. The guy’s face was totally blank. I guess he’s either sick of talking about it or resentful that it’s his most popular work.
Hey Bill, lighten up! It could be worse – you could have died right after Meatballs. How would you like that movie to be your legacy?
* = said video game, which everybody thought was doomed after Activision decided not to release it, is apparently close to landing a new distributor. Read that whole thing over here.
