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HEY REMEMBER THE NINETIES

Beloved Letterman sidekick Calvert DeForest and the members of Nine Inch Nails circa 1994. DeForest gave the band a memorable introduction at that year’s Woodstock: “Ladies and gentlemen, punch your balls off and please welcome Nine Inch Nails!”

Q: “Twin Peaks” Is Coming Back! Aren’t You Shocked?

A: Y’all probably think I make these questions up in some weird narcissistic game, but they’re all based on true life events. My roommate blurted this out last night, oddly enough, as part of a response to a query I had about his Ghostbusters fandom. Welcome to Pop Culture: The Florida Condo.

No, I’m not shocked that “Twin Peaks” is returning, at all. If you browse Tumblr for more than five seconds you can see this show (along with “X Files”) has managed to captivate a whole new generation of people who crave somber weirdos, damaged beauties, and Jack Nance (who was a little of both). David Lynch has probably always hoped for some kind of do-over on that last “TP” season. What better time than now? It is 25 years after that lady said that thing in the dream. Also, “The Cleveland Show” got cancelled.

It’ll be interesting to see what they do. “Twin Peaks” was one of the first “adult” shows I watched, or was allowed to watch. I’m not sure I understood how odd it was, comparatively speaking, but I enjoyed it because it was a crime drama. There was a point, and they made it captivating (even when it got kinda dumb toward the end). “Northern Exposure,” on the other hand…did they spin that series out of a Folger’s commercial?

If the new “Twin Peaks” is terrible I have dibs on the headline “AGENT FAIL COOPER.” Alternate: “THERE’S A SHIT IN THE PERCOLATOR!”

Unsolicited Blah Blah Blah On “The Larry Sanders Show”

- following my umpteenth multi-season binge I have to lock “Larry Sanders” in as my second favorite tv program ever; it pulls off the show-within-a-show concept masterfully, presenting top tier Hollywood parody along side deft exploration of humanity’s awkward, painful flashes (Garry Shandling says “Sanders” is really about people searching for love, and he’s right)

- my first favorite tv program ever is “Space Ghost: Coast to Coast,” which takes the “Sanders” concept and swaps humanity for outer space-themed absurdity (elsewhere in my top five: “The Simpsons,” “Duckman”)

- for a program that ran from ’92 until ’98 it’s hard to sniff out any super dated aspects of “Sanders”; that said, it’s trippy to see the episode where they let a pre-“Daily Show” Jon Stewart take over for Larry and he runs everything into the ground, considering he did the exact opposite in real life

- I’m never prepared for that Garry Shandling/Roseanne make-out scene, and I mean that in the best way; you really get caught up in their attraction (similarly, the Mary Lynn Rajskub/Jeffrey Tambor kissing scene that you expect to be weird turns out very sweet)

- so many great little character flourishes pop up once and are never mentioned again, like Artie’s enjoyment of Pod era Breeders and the fact Paula cuts Darlene’s hair

- watch this show for too long and your head will reverberate with all of Rip Torn’s thunderous growling

- my brain would collapse into its own black hole if you asked me to name my favorite “Sanders” guest star; David Duchovny’s up there, Roseanne’s up there, Bruno Kirby’s up there, Paul Mooney, the Butthole Surfers, Wu Tang Clan, Kevin Nealon…I can already feel neurons dying

- if the holodeck from “Star Trek” was real I’d spend a stupid amount of time lounging around Larry’s office

- my favorite line from this series and possibly from television as a whole is when an exasperated Larry tells Artie, “You know, talking to you is like talking to you”; that’s a top three contender for inscription on my headstone

Unsolicited Mumblings On The Replacements Playin’ J Fallon

- just noticed the ad Fallon’s holding for their show at the tennis stadium Photoshops the PTMM arms into tennis jackets; nice one

- the new guitarist has Goo Goo Doll hair/air; at least he fits sonically

- I hope I rock a t-shirt as well as Westerberg when I’m fifty

- they sound great, but I’d still like to hear a reunion with Mars back on drums

- the ending tease was cruel; my heart leapt that they might play another

Q: Favorite Batman Villain?

A: Gorshin’s Riddler. Cartoony but unquestionably malevolent. Very strong currents of rage, madness. Possibly more intelligent than the rest of the Bat-villains, even Bookworm. A laugh that could shatter glass (too bad for Cesar Romero, whose Joker debuted later and never found a chuckle as iconic).

Thank dog the ’66 Batman series is finally coming to home video this year. There just ain’t enough classic Gorsh on that YouTube.

Slingback Sunday

Here’s another classic from 2010: yours truly in Prospect Park, Brooklyn, hovering near that neighborhood’s somewhat infamous bootleg Ectomobile. Spotting this car would have been plenty of excitement for one afternoon, but since New York City is New York City that day I also met comedy star John Gemberling at a coffee shop, drank pea soup at a pea soup dispensary, was issued a police citation for being in the park after sunset, and attended a cookie bake-off where the dj played nothing but death metal.

Not that it matters now, but I wasn’t actually in the park after sunset, I was in the park during sunset. That stuck in my craw, so I contested the ticket in court. My case was sucked into this long line of vending citations; the judge got to me and I had barely confirmed my name when he quickly bellowed:

“Mr. Greene, do you know that you’re not supposed to be in the park after sundown? Great, dismissed.”

#justice

Things That Make You Go Hmmm

Have you ever noticed how United States Forest Service Chief Thomas Tidwell looks like Jack McBrayer in old age makeup? Have you also ever noticed how Arnold Schwarzenegger is melting into a Tommy Lee Jones doppelgänger? And what of Smokey Bear’s “no eye contact” policy as of late? What’s that guy hiding?

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