Gallagher Still An Asshole, Hates Water

You can actually take a drink now during your show! You know, George Burns performed smoking a cigar, and never needed a drink of water on a stool. But now this has become a tradition in America. They more or less have a stool ready for you and ask, ‘What water ya want?’ To me, as a visual artist, everything that’s in the picture should have meaning—what does a stool and a bottle of water mean? I can’t get through the show without hydrating? How is that funny? It’s just more of the same mediocre, lackadaisical, lack of quality, acceptance of the average that goes on in America.”

– Gallagher, noted watermelon smasher

That’s just the tip of the iceberg. In the same interview, Gallagher bitches about Katie Couric and Conan O’Brien, defends Michael Vick, and spends WAY too much time bragging about his own reading/comprehension skills. Let the insanity wash over you here.

Remember, this guy is famous for hitting fruit with a sledgehammer.

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