A: Either 1960s California so I could try to tackle whatever that thing is in the Patterson film or 1990s Chicago so I could try to tackle that extra in Home Alone who is supposedly Elvis Presley. I’m all about the big issues.
All the best this blog had to offer from the Year of the Horse. Shalom.
Artisanal Life Hack (Sorry Not Sorry): 2013 In Review
Unsolicited Notes/Thoughts On We’re A Happy Family
JG2’s Top Ten Albums & Singles Of 2013
Unsolicited Thoughts On The Price Of Gold
Q: Have You Met Carrot Top?
Derisive Names You Can Use For The Super Bowl
Area Man Acknowledges Ninja Turtle Reboot
Greg Rivera: The JG2Land Interview
“You Traded Peña?”
Unsolicited Thoughts/Notes On Dookie 20 Years Later
In Praise Of Harold Ramis
Unsolicited Thoughts/Notes On Going Berserk
An Annotated History Of Never Realized Book Projects
2001: A Ranch Odyssey
Commence au Festival
“You Really Embarrassed Me Tonight At Red Lobster.”
On Erdélyi Tamás
Mashed Potatoes Can Be Your Friends
Fifteen Hall Of Fame Drummers From The Past Score & Five
Unsolicited Thoughts/Notes On Grease 2
Boo, I Tellsya: The Absolute Toppest Horror Movies
Monte Melnick: The JG2Land Interview
Unsolicited Musings On GTA V
Unsolicited Blah Blah Blah On “The Larry Sanders Show”
Ancient Central Florida Secret: The Splendid China Winn-Dixie
Unsolicited Free Floating Vapors On Feigbusters
Unsolicited Musings On Humanoids From The Deep
The plan for my next book has always been a history of the Ghostbusters film franchise and its ancillary properties. Sadly, I must now abandon that idea. This week it was revealed (to me) that Sony, the company owning the rights to Ghostbusters, is publishing a historical volume of extremely similar parameters in September. The party delivering this news was the publishing house most interested in working with me on what I had tentatively titled A Convenient Parallel Dimension: Ghostbusters, 1974-2016. They’re open to hearing other ideas I’m sitting on; time to tear through old notebooks and ferret out potential ideas.
No need to invoke the wrath of the slor: we’re getting an officially licensed Ghostbusters history. I’m sure it’ll be wonderful. I’m actually surprised and somewhat ashamed the Sony tome slipped past my radar for so long. Turns out that Christmas leak didn’t give us everything. Also, I can admit I hadn’t exactly done mountains of work on my own GB project. Subconsciously I must have sensed this. I could feel the Twinkie expanding.
So, do you think the world needs a book about InnerSpace?
You’ve listened to the entire first season of the “Yaxzon Jackson” podcast, now literally watch myself, Rollie Hatch, C. LeMar McLean, and Kirk Howle spin our wheels on Dangerous one last time. What are our final thoughts on this album? What does Kirk actually know about college football? How many Jerry Mathers jokes can we get through before we spit up on ourselves like stupid babies? Click play and find out.
Here now, the final two episodes of “Yaxzon Jackson” Season One, in which Rollie and I discuss at length the songs that close Dangerous. Surprisingly we have little to say about a recycled Dionne Warwick ballad and a “Jam” rewrite; thus, discussion turns to Haywood Nelson, college football, the Ramones, our few listeners we know by name, and (of course) multi-instrumentalist Teddy Riley.
Again, thanks for tuning in, and keep your eyes peeled for our self-indulgent wrap up episode where we reflect upon all we’ve accomplished podcasting about a latter day Michael Jackson album. The main difference is we’ll be wearing tuxedos.
A: Because it’s fun and I get a kick out of annoying you?
Actually, I’m not really sure. According to the Google-box excessive throat clearing is usually the result of allergies, which I do have in various shades. However, I can’t help believing my mucus chutes are a little messed up from a severe tonsillitis I had in my twenties. It came and went a handful of times, growing more vicious with each episode, but the doctors all told me the tonsil removal procedure is risky for adults. The recovery time’s super long, and it can mess up your vocal chords permanently.
It felt like the tonsillitis had already jacked my voice to some degree (it was a little stronger before) so I took a “wait and see” attitude. Here we is, ten years later, tonsils still caught in mah throat. Haven’t had tonsillitis since (knock on wood) but I do be “a-HEMing” a lot. There are worse ailments with which to be saddled. Like taco leg, or chronic leprechaun syndrome.
The throat clearing doesn’t prevent me from “living.” I made it to the top of Pike’s Peak a few years ago with no problems. I’ve been to Des Moines and no one tried to choke me out. I can do everything a regular throat clearer can do. Swimming, horseback riding, making shitty tampon jokes.
Please, save your pity. Save it for the thousands of Americans who live with the indignity of taco leg. They’re the ones who really need it.
Finally, Rollie and I reach the most dismal song on Dangerous and spend two hours trying to avoid talking about it. At least you will finally learn the origin of our friendship and a few interesting facts about Marilu Henner.
Only two more episodes of this grand experiment. Then, of course, our wrap party episode, which will be five hours long I’m sure and guest star several hilarious and notable figures. #yaxxonjackson4life